On Finding Happiness

Cheryl Phillips of Daily Blonde appeared on Connecting Women Radio. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Connectingwomen/2009/05/15/Connecting-Women. Cheryl wrote a post for Connecting Women.

I read this quote in Vanity Fair magazine. It’s not funny or sarcastic. It is just straightforward and mirrors my thoughts on life exactly. I think this is something all women should have as their mantra.

"As women, we have more of a tendency to be people-pleasers, and I know a lot of women who are not vocal about what makes them happy. I was like that in my early 20s, but not anymore. I spent a lot of time not being clear about who I was and what was important to me. It’s easy to be taken advantage of if you’re not honest. I knew that dance of trying to please a man, trying to guess what they want you to be, and I got really tired of that, really confused and frustrated. I decided I was sick of trying to figure out what everybody else wanted, and I should just decide what I want, and be honest, and not spend all my time guessing. -Katherine Heigl

With each year of my life comes change. Some in the form of a new creases under my eyes. Some in the form of a hidden strength that finally surfaces. I spend less time worrying about the creases these days and more time giving myself kudos for finally having strength in areas where I was painfully weak.

Bottom line: I know how to balance that fine line between doing for others and doing for myself. When I finally learned to put myself in first position, people around me became happier. When I removed negative people from my life, or at least ignored them, I started to breathe again.
I am often known as a funny chick. That's my favorite side. (Well, when it comes to a photograph, I prefer to my right side at a slight angle. Mostly because I haven't quite mastered the strength of not having chocolate...often. Hips don't lie.) However, humor is just something that comes naturally for me. The rest of me is a work in progress and a project I want to keep working on. I actually enjoy evolving and becoming a stronger "me" every day. That is how I've found happiness.

I don't have a degree in psychology and I am so not a fan of self-help books. What I do have first hand experience in is a life that has been an interesting mix of love, fun, disappointment, sadness and times spent just treading water. Otherwise known as surviving. It has been an on-going lesson in the search to be content...with myself.

How have you found happiness in your life? Have you learned to put "you" first? It's not as easy as it sounds but the rewards are great. Try it...today.